Find Time to Respond (Not React) To Your Worries

The Time Finder with Paula Eder

The way you use your time is the way you live your life.

Find Time to Respond (Not React) To Your Worries

Posted on February 3, 2009, under Time Choices.

Last week on The Time Finder we talked a little bit about the impact that worry can have on your experience of time, and on your stress level.

It seems obvious that worry would add to stress. What is less obvious is the way that slowing down and facing a worry can relieve stress.

When we are worried our instinct is usually to speed up, either to get away from, or to try to address as quickly as possible whatever is the cause of our concern. Both of these responses are reactive and will increase, rather than decrease our feelings of stress.

If you try to get away from something that you’re worried about, you are reinforcing the magnitude of its “scariness.”

Pema Chodron, in one of her workshops, tells a wonderful story of a monk who was approaching a monastery that was guarded by fierce dogs. As he drew closer they came racing out, barking, growling, and baring their teeth. He was terrified and his first impulse was to turn and run. But he knew they would be upon him an instant. So, instead, he paused and took a deep breath. Then he did something surprising. He ran TOWARD the dogs. They stopped in their tracks, turned, and ran in the other direction!

There are two key elements for you to consider in this story.

One is the deep breath. The monk chose to pause in the face of swiftly approaching danger. This is a small-but-powerful time choice that immediately puts you in charge of yourself and your moment, even as everything in you may be shouting, “Flee!”

Second is the choice to move toward, rather than away from, the source of the fear or worry. Turning away from a fear, you give yourself the message that it is “too big” or “too scary” or “too hard” to deal with. Turning toward it, you immediately let yourself know that it’s of a manageable size. You may not have all the answers, but you’re taking charge, and that is very reassuring.

Once you have taken a breath and taken charge, your mind is cleared and you are able to be much more creative in your problem-solving. These two simple choices about how you use your time (in the briefest of moments) make a huge difference!

What is your immediate response when you’re confronted with a looming worry or a big fear? How do you choose to use your time, as you respond in the moment? Let me know, I’d love to hear!

What if you could find another hour every day? You can! For more Time Finding resources, you are invited to sign up and download The New Finding Time Boundary Template. It’s FREE, and when you sign up you will also receive (if you don’t already) my FREE, weekly Finding Time Tips and my FREE, monthly Award-Winning Finding Time E-zine!

Let’s explore time together …

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