Goals and Values: When you have them in sync, the sky is the limit. But when they are out of sync, you’re likely to find yourself mired in confusion and procrastination.
A decoy habit is a habit that a person claims to want to adopt—but really doesn’t intend to do. Often, decoy habits reflect other people’s values or priorities. “I want to cook dinner every night.” “I want to finish my Ph.D. thesis by the end of the year.” “I want to give up coffee.”
The decoy provides cover—we don’t have to acknowledge the habits that we actually follow, because there’s this other, better habit that we intend to adopt.
Goals and Values: What are Yours?
So, let’s see what Heart-Based Time Management can offer to help you get your head and your heart are working together! Here are 3 tips that I think will get you on track:
- Observe Yourself: The best way to get to where you want to be is to first know where you are starting. I suggest that you watch your behaviors to learn what you value. This forms a solid base for changes you may want to make in the future. Without this base, you will be building your house on a foundation of sand.
- Set Judgments Aside: You won’t be able to observe accurately if you are judging what you see. Work to recognize your self-critical voice and counter it with values-neutral statements. Often your judgments are based on old scripts that have become rote. You won’t know yourself or your values until you step away from all the ‘should’s’ and give yourself some breathing space.
- Start Small: When you feel ready to set a goal, start with a small one and be sure to have a manageable time-frame. (A day at a time is a good place to start, and often works best, in my opinion.) Mammoth, global goals are a set up – and a good clue that your goals and values probably aren’t yet in sync. Once you’ve set your goal, then observe yourself (without judgment) and tweak as needed.
Letting go of the ‘should’s’ allows your goals and values to evolve organically, based on what you see and who you are. Unhooking your goals and values from your inner critic means that you relate to them as yours. Therefore, you have no need or desire to rebel or procrastinate … or avoid what your head and heart agree on!
And if you’d like to learn more about your own patterns and start changing them, my new Exercise and Guide Book titled, “‘These Critical Voices Are Driving Me Crazy!’ How to Use Positive Self-Talk to Save Your Sanity and Your Time!” offers proven techniques and practical tips to quiet those disruptive, haunting and hostile voices of self-criticism.
We really can make conscious choices about the kinds of messages that we give ourselves. And as an added bonus when you purchase this Exercise and Guide Book you can quickly get back your investment. You’ll find all the details at the end of the Guide Book.
So, this Exercise and Guide Book gives you a step-by-step path to take back your power and quiet the self-criticism that saps your confidence, your energy, and your time.
Don’t let those hurtful voices hold you hostage! Click the link to get started!
- Perfectionism Tips and Time Tools: Favorites from The Time Finder (thetimefinder.com)
- Goal-Setting to Stay Flexible and Find Time! (thetimefinder.com)
- Stress Busting Tip for Finding More Time! (thetimefinder.com)