values - The Time Finder with Paula Eder

The Time Finder with Paula Eder

The way you use your time is the way you live your life.

Find Time to Nourish Your Way Through Your Transitions

Posted on May 16, 2012 by Paula, under Transitions and Time.

Springtime is a time of transition, and finding time to support yourself as you go through your life transitions is a time management skill that is key to maintaining your energy, productivity, and perspective … no matter what! The reality is that your schedule is already busy with relationships, work, and the logistics of daily living. And then there are times when you are faced with a major life transition.

What are major life transitions? This may vary from person to person, depending on your values, cultural norms, etc. So, for starters, it’s helpful to think about how YOU define a life transition. Starting or ending primary relationships, having a child, moving to new surroundings, and changing jobs are likely to be major life transitions for anyone who undergoes them. Other life events may also affect you profoundly. What is unique to you is how you experience such events and how you find the time to meet your personal needs.

To get yourself familiar with your own relationship to your transitions, take any example of an event that is a life transition. Set aside 15 minutes once or twice a week to think about it. During your 15 minutes of reflection, write down the support you will need and the changes you will need to make to find the time to successfully navigate this transition.

This is a process of developing and deepening your intimacy with yourself; and you may discover things that surprise you. That’s because transitions are times of great opportunity and also great vulnerability. Think of yourself as a new seedling, germinating and pushing its way up through the ground. A fundamental change is taking place – and your task is to befriend yourself, help yourself, nurture yourself, as you come through!

So, welcome the information that you glean from your inner dialogue, and follow-through on giving yourself what you need. In this way you build self-trust. You come to know, right down to your toes, that you will be there for yourself, no matter what!

Your life transitions often involve other people, too. So stay tuned. We’ll continue and expand on this next week, as we explore more of the in’s and out’s of finding time to nourish yourself through your transitions!

So, want to learn more about how you can expand and deepen your time and efforts … in whatever areas you choose? Here’s a great way to explore avenues to increasing your time skills and heart-based power – whether it’s in your business, or your personal life. I am so pleased to be able to offer my expertise and support as The Official SelfGrowth.com Guide to “Time Management”.

You can visit by clicking the link, and when you do you’ll find lots of time management articles by experts in the field, along with a vibrant and welcoming on-line community. Stop by my Expert Page and leave a comment or question … or just say hello. There are lots of ways to connect … let’s get started!

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Find Time to Accept Yourself and Transform Your Time with Empowered Compassion™

Posted on April 4, 2012 by Paula, under Time and Energy, Time Transformation.

Finding Time to accept all of who you are is a gentle, deliberate process that will transform your time and give you a solid base for action. That’s because being your most productive self, your most empowered self, means being your WHOLE self. And that’s where Empowered Compassion™ comes in.

Like the in-breath that is followed by the out-breath, Empowered Compassion™ offers you exactly what you need from moment-to-moment so that you can not just survive, but thrive in this life.

Acceptance = Access: When you accept all of you, you give yourself access to all of you. And you need to have access to your fullest self to live each moment richly, abundantly, and successfully! Think about it.

Would you want to try to build a house or type up a business proposal with one arm tied behind your back? But, if you wall off mistakes, embarrassments, or painful or troubling parts of yourself, you are hampering your efforts in just that way.

Compassion changes all of that and gives you full access to all of you. Try this brief exercise and see how quickly compassion can open and transform this very moment for you:

Soft Goes Deep

Find a comfortable spot , settle in, close your eyes, take a deep breath, and relax.
Picture your compassionate self approaching from a distance. Watch as she draws closer and closer. How do you feel as she draws near?
Think back to a time when you were afraid or troubled and needed support. Let you compassionate self’s heart fill with warm and welcoming love – the same as you’d offer a friend in need.
What do you want to ask of your compassionate self? Let yourself soften and ask for what you need.
Listen and let your compassionate self respond from her heart, giving you what you need freely and lovingly.
How does it feel to soften and fully experience this warm exchange? You are empowering yourself with compassion in a new way, as you come back to this present moment.

Notice how you can see what you need and access it from your compassionate self anytime you soften and travel within. You possess the power to deepen your self-knowledge and self-acceptance right now. And it doesn’t have to take a lot of time. This is really as much about finding heart as it is about finding time.

And the truly great news is that when you find heart you transform your time! When you cultivate Empowered Compassion™ your courage and self-acceptance accompany you into the next moment.

As you befriend yourself and your mistakes, lessons emerge and you are enriched. Then, as you love and accept yourself more, you find it easier to love and accept others. You own more of your life and this enables you to remain centered, focused, and productive amidst the heat and noise of living. Cultivating Empowered Compassion™ is a lifelong journey, and each small step is important.

So to find heart and transform your time, take these steps:

Slow down.
Listen deep.
Befriend your whole self.

As you open from the inside with Empowered Compassion™, notice how this transforms your experience of yourself, of others, and of your time.

And are you interested in learning more about the Heart-Based Time Management™ Path? Here’s one way that you can transform and deepen your relationship to time in the Heart-Based Way … I invite you to explore Secrets of Heart-Based Time Management™ – my chapter in the book I co-authored - Stepping Stones to Success! In it I share my proven system for exploring and harnessing the power of your mind, your body and your spirit to help you deepen your experience of time and of your life.

As you work with the ideas I offer, you’ll explore your patterns, clarify your values, identify and prioritize your goals … and create your path for achieving them. You can give yourself the gift of this wonderful resource today, and get started on your journey toward success, Stepping Stone by Stepping Stone …just click this link to get the details!

Find Time to Fuel Your Resilience With Empowered Compassion™ (thetimefinder.com)
Find Time for Empowered Compassion™ (thetimefinder.com)
Find Time to Put a Little Love in Your Heart (thetimefinder.com)

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Find Time This Spring to Let Go and Make Changes

Posted on March 21, 2012 by Paula, under Time and Energy, Time Choices.

Finding time to make the changes that you value in your life is always going to involve letting go. You let go of something old and replace it with something new.

In many ways, it’s just that simple. However, letting go is a layered and sometimes quite challenging process. As we discussed yesterday, even seeing what you might want to let go of requires willingness and a commitment to open yourself to clear vision. We live our days embedded in our habitual ways of being. To step aside from that and see it clearly takes courage … and time. And it’s a very good investment of your time!

After you’ve got a realistic sense of where you are, think about what you’d like to change. Is there an activity that you’d like to add to your day? Let’s say that you feel the need to build in time for more exercise. How can you go about doing that in a way that optimizes your ability to follow through?

Well. after you’ve recognized something that you’d like to change, the next step is to break it down further. How much time do you want to give to this activity? Will you do it once a day? More often? Be as specific as possible, because this begins to give you some sense of what you are going to need to let go of.

Next, go back and re-look at what you saw when you surveyed your day. Is there anything that you’d like to let go of that jumps right out at you? That’s the easiest place to start – the activities that you are ready and willing to jettison. If that doesn’t give you enough time for what you want to add, then you may need to trim time in other areas, or shuffle your schedule around.

What’s key here is that you first identify something positive that you want to add to your daily activities. That gives you an affirmative reason for letting go of things that you may not feel are helpful – or just aren’t as high on your priority list.

It’s not easy to let go of something you are used to – whether it’s a net positive or a net negative in your life. That’s why replacing it, proactively, with an activity that you value, will go a long way toward ensuring your success!

Are you interested in exploring letting go and making change some more … and learning more about the Heart-Based Time Management™ Path? Here’s one way that you can transform and deepen your relationship to time in the Heart-Based Way … I invite you to explore Secrets of Heart-Based Time Management™ – my chapter in the book I co-authored - Stepping Stones to Success! In it I share my proven system for exploring and harnessing the power of your mind, your body and your spirit to help you deepen your experience of time and of your life.

Find Time to Fuel Your Resilience With Empowered Compassion™ (thetimefinder.com)
Find Time to Listen and Learn What You Need (thetimefinder.com)
Find Time for Empowered Compassion™ (thetimefinder.com)
Find Time to Be Yourself, Respect Yourself, and Do What You Can: 3 Timely Tips-Part 1 (thetimefinder.com)

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Find Time to Fuel Your Resilience With Empowered Compassion™

Posted on March 14, 2012 by Paula, under Time and Energy, Time Transformation.

Finding time to deal with life’s ups and downs, staying on track and keeping your eye on the prize, even as circumstances shift can be a big challenge. Empowered Compassion™ can help you bounce back, no matter what kinds of changes confront you. How?

Well, Empowered Compassion™ gains power from its underlying paradox. It embraces – even celebrates – opposites.

Empowered Compassion™ embodies yin and yang, inhalation and exhalation, acceptance and striving …

Empowerment, of course, is the masculine, or yang, component. When you empower yourself, your core strengths support you, keeping you upright yet flexible. Empowerment works like toned core muscles, keeping you steady no matter what comes your way.

You embrace challenges, knowing that solving problems supports your evolution.
You are defined and focused as you tend your boundaries. These boundaries protect the hours of your day as a force field of intentionality.
You are realistic and alert to life’s constant changes.
You take pleasure in creating goals, large or small.

Compassion is the feminine, receptive yin. And it’s important to note that it enhances your strength just as much as the yang – but in very different ways. Here are some examples:

Your empathy towards yourself and others helps you to create and maintain a balanced perspective.
Compassion provides a natural antidote to perfectionism. Self-acceptance overpowers a swarm of perfectionist pests like fearful people-pleasing, procrastination, and over-polishing work. Think of how that can free up both your energy and your time!
Because compassion sees and accepts everything without judging or punishing, it becomes easier for you to befriend and learn from mistakes. So you approach challenges with curiosity rather than fear.

Empowered Compassion™ is a central component of Heart Based Time Management™. Stay tuned, because I’ll be sharing more about this key value in the months to come. Empowered Compassion™ provides each of us with a method for bringing our integrated strengths into every moment.

Are you interested in exploring your resilience further and learning more about the Heart-Based Time Management™ Path? Here’s one way that you can transform and deepen your relationship to time in the Heart-Based Way … I invite you to explore Secrets of Heart-Based Time Management™ – my chapter in the book I co-authored - Stepping Stones to Success! In it I share my proven system for exploring and harnessing the power of your mind, your body and your spirit to help you deepen your experience of time and of your life.

Find Time to Recover: 3 Keys for Healing and Resilience (thetimefinder.com)
Finding Time to Stop Living Someone Else’s Life (thetimefinder.com)
Find Time to Be Yourself, Respect Yourself, and Do What You Can: 3 Timely Tips-Part 1 (thetimefinder.com)
Find Time to Listen and Learn What You Need (thetimefinder.com)

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Find Time to Uncover Your Time Legacy: What Do You Carry into Your Present from Your Past?

Posted on February 28, 2012 by Paula, under Time Choices, Time Transformation.

Finding time to discover the childhood roots of your current relationship with time can be hugely rewarding! Indeed, there are many things that we inherit from our families, and uncovering your time legacy, so that you can make conscious choices about what to keep and what to leave behind, will be at once enlightening and freeing for you.

There may be any number of ways that you adopted an approach to time that you learned long ago and that now works against you. But the good news is that your parents’ time priorities don’t have to be your destiny – not if you engage in some detective work!

So, today I invite you to explore just how you may have come to live someone else’s priorities. When you start by seeing your history with clarity and compassion, you can accept where you are. This, in turn, gives you a solid base, as you then make choices to transform your relationship with time!

To start with, as a child, you were profoundly influenced by your family’s time choices. They taught you important messages about values – what’s important and what isn’t.

Take a minute or two, right now, to recall the family in which you grew up. How did each adult in your household spend time? Create a vivid picture in your mind of how they lived out their priorities, one day after another. Sense the fundamental and personal beliefs that guided their choices. Let the picture take shape and fill itself out.

Next, quickly jot down a few observations about their use of time.

What came first?
What came last?
What message does this give you about their values?
How do your values align with theirs?

Your answers to these questions provide you with a good starting point for exploring your current time choices. You may want to revisit this exercise to flesh out more and more details over time. As you explore, you will illuminate patterns – some of which are helpful and some which you may want to change. This is your time legacy.

So stay tuned, as we continue to explore this truly fundamental element in your approach to your time. Clarifying the elements of your time legacy gives you a powerful key to transforming your relationship with time.

And in the meantime, want to learn more about how you can expand and deepen your time and efforts … in whatever areas you choose? Here’s a great way to explore avenues to increasing your time skills and heart-based power – whether it’s in your business, or your personal life. I am so pleased to be able to offer my expertise and support as The Official SelfGrowth.com Guide to “Time Management”.

Finding Time by Growing Your Courage Incrementally: Today’s Timely Tip! (thetimefinder.com)
Find Time to Build Your Brave Muscles With a Daily Courage Workout (thetimefinder.com)
Find Time to Know the State of YOUR Union: Are Your Head and Heart in Sync for Success? (thetimefinder.com)

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Find Time and Courage to Move Ahead by Letting Go: 3 Timely Tips

Posted on January 18, 2012 by Paula, under Time Choices.

Finding time is all about saying No to one thing to say Yes to another, as I often say. The No that you say to one thing is what actually makes your Yes to something else possible, and meaningful. It’s all about how you make your time choices.

So, let’s pause for a moment. How do you feel about your time choices so far today? Don’t come from a critical place or you’ll clam up. Just let yourself feel.

Are there choices you’d like to change? Most of us are going to say yes to that … but before you start thinking about how you want to change those choices, let’s pause again.

Ask yourself, what is it that, for YOU, leads you to want to change how you use your time?

Is it …

Restlessness?
Ambition?
Intuition?
Inspiration?
Supporting your family?

It can be very helpful to feel out just what creates the desire for a change. That lays the foundation for future time choices. Then, having clarified what fuels your desire for change, it’s important to know what ignites it.

Courage is the key! Because moving into change means letting go of what’s familiar and comfortable, it’s courage that inspires you to let go to move ahead.

Since your time is finite, and your energy is, too, it’s important to make the kinds of courageous time choices that enable you to move directions that are in sync with your values and your goals.

As you identify new activities that are especially meaningful to you, you may find it easier to limit activities that compete with your emerging goals with these 3 tips to kindle your courage with your enthusiasm:

Talk to yourself about the changes you desire.
Validate how your new life choices reflect your evolution and growth.
Envision yourself on your new path. Feel yourself move.

The more fully you commit to your emerging self, the easier it will be to let go of activities that are no longer a good fit. And the energy you release from your old attachments comes with you – just imagine how you’ll be able to use that!

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