But this “chronological makeover” might require more than a good memory. Did Mom and Dad’s actions match their words? Or did “What I say” and “What I do” contradict one another? It’s quite helpful to explore this, for one very compelling reason:  Mixed messages speak loudest.

Let’s say that a family member told you one thing about time and then did something completely different. How did you feel then, and how do you feel now about it now? Conflicting messages that confused you as a child can easily lead to “disconnects” in later life.

And those disconnects may create painful, missed opportunities. Fortunately, you can untangle these time knots and realign your energies. Even better, you can take an important step forward today!

Try an exercise about double messages with double benefits:

1. Think of an instance where you struggle to match your time choices with your expressed values.
2. Now, think back to your childhood, when someone you looked up said one thing about time and did something that differed.
3. Quickly write down what was said and what was done.
4. How did you feel about this? Write that down, too.
5. Compare and contrast your current conflict with what you witnessed others doing when you were young.
6. What’s similar? What’s different? What patterns emerge? Patterns always tell tales.
7. Now that you’re listening to the actions beneath the words, consult your heart. How might stories from your parents’ lives carry clues about your current situation? What past incidents narrow your sense of possibilities?
8. Envision a path to more rewarding time choices! Make this as vivid as possible, so you can really experience your progress on this path. This visualization helps motivate you and alerts you to opportunities to move forward.
9. Finally, ask your intuition about how to proactively walk this path and align deeds with words.

Engaging in this exercise will enrich you in at least 2 ways.

• First, you gain a compassionate context for time choices you make that puzzle and frustrate you. That feels SO much better!
• Second, you are in a much better position to change a troubling time choice once you understand its roots.

I would love to hear about your personal journey of finding time to live in power and harmony

And as you continue your journey, transforming yourself and your relationship with time, consider this:  Are you an entrepreneur, consultant, or small business owner who’s ready to take the next big step?  If you want to learn how to create and to keep a successful business running on your own, then this is for you! “How to Create Credibility as a Freelancer” is a booklet with 70 expert-proven tips that will help you recharge your energy and motivation, increase your visibility, and sharpen those vital organizational and time management skills.

Success is within your reach, so don’t wait, click this link and get started today!  http://bit.ly/FreelanceTips

Related articles

• Find Time to Know the State of YOUR Union: Are Your Head and Heart in Sync for Success? (thetimefinder.com)
• Find Time to Explore Your “Time Roots” (thetimefinder.com)
• Find Time to Free Yourself from the Perfectionism Trap-Your Heart Holds the Keys! (thetimefinder.com)

This means setting aside some time to check in with yourself periodically.  For some this might be a daily, weekly, or monthly ritual.  The more time you spend doing this (and the more often you do it) the better – but it’s important to find what works for you and to build a pattern that you can trust.

You might ask yourself something as simple as, “How are you doing today?”  Answer honestly, and strive to open up to an internal dialogue.  Let a back-and-forth evolve.  This won’t happen all at once, but as you speak and listen to yourself, you may be surprised at what you discover.

It may feel like you are getting to know a new friend.  How wonderful!

As you learn more about the State of Your Union, you will be able to adjust the ways that you work and use your time, to better fit with your true values and needs.  Keep the dialogue going as you tweak things.

You can’t predict, at the outset, where this path may lead.  But here’s one thing I can absolutely guarantee:

When your goals are in sync with your values, your head and your heart work in tandem, freeing up energy and creativity that you may not have ever known that you had!

Why, it would be like the Legislative and Executive Branches of the Government working together.  Just imagine what could be accomplished …

So, I encourage you to check in with yourself frequently about the State of Your Union.  Listen to what your head and heart have to say to each other … and watch the possibilities blossom!

And as you bring your head and heart into sync, transforming yourself and your relationship with time, consider this:  Are you an entrepreneur, consultant, or small business owner who’s ready to take the next big step?  If you want to learn how to create and to keep a successful business running on your own, then this is for you! “How to Create Credibility as a Freelancer” is a booklet with 70 expert-proven tips that will help you recharge your energy and motivation, increase your visibility, and sharpen those vital organizational and time management skills.

Success is within your reach, so don’t wait, click this link and get started today!  http://bit.ly/FreelanceTips

Related articles

• Find Time to Give Yourself Exactly What You Need Every Single Day! (thetimefinder.com)
• Find Time to Nourish Your Courage with Love: Today’s Timely Tip (thetimefinder.com)
• Find Time to Celebrate Clarity and Realism this Holiday Season (thetimefinder.com)
• Find Time to Respect Yourself-When No Means Yes to You! (thetimefinder.com)

One of the biggest ways that your courageous explorations will nourish you is that, with each step, you find that you actually have more of yourself to enjoy your time with!  Even better, this expanding self is your energetic and proactive self – the one that buoys your confidence and sparks your interest in new things.

But you and I both know that some days that expansive courage flows freely through your veins. Other days, perhaps you feel in need of a transfusion. What can you do on the “droop days”?

If you tend to scold yourself, prod yourself to buck up, or give up on yourself in exasperation, try something new. I suggest that you try something simple and profound … and brave … like love.

Self-acceptance or self-love is the fuel that, like oxygen in the blood, will keep you going AND nourish you at the same time. This acceptance can be very simple and very compassionate. Comfort with who you are this very moment provides an unshakable foundation for taking fresh new steps. Furthermore, your self-love helps you pace yourself realistically, so you can stay grounded, and learn as you go.

I like to think of my existence as a progression of loving life lessons. Life provides the lessons; I provide the love. This compassionate embrace of each experience further fuels my courage and opens me to whatever is around the corner or beyond the next ridge!

So, next time you feel a strong desire to make a change, ask yourself if you’re motivated by self-loyalty or self-criticism.

If you sense any judgment or impatience, slow down! Start by replacing harsh messages with self-affirming ones. Then you know that you are acting in your own best interests, not reacting to real or imagined criticism from others.

Begin any journey appreciating who you are. You might give yourself an affirmation like, “I’m exactly where I need to be.”  And know, right down to your toes, that you are!

Everything in your life has led you to this point. So warmly validate any and all steps that you have taken so far. The time you take to create a compassionate base for your courage will reward you every day of your life.  This is such a powerful and sustaining practice … I highly recommend it!

As you courageously transform yourself and your relationship with time, consider this:  Are you an entrepreneur, consultant, or small business owner who’s ready to take the next big step?  If you want to learn how to create and to keep a successful business running on your own, then this is for you! “How to Create Credibility as a Freelancer” is a booklet with 70 expert-proven tips that will help you recharge your energy and motivation, increase your visibility, and sharpen those vital organizational and time management skills.

Success is within your reach, so don’t wait, click this link and get started today!  http://bit.ly/FreelanceTips

Related articles

• Find Time to Give Yourself Exactly What You Need Every Single Day! (thetimefinder.com)
• Find Time to Survive and Thrive Through Every Transition Time! (thetimefinder.com)
• Find Time to Respect Yourself-When No Means Yes to You! (thetimefinder.com)

Don’t you sometimes wish that someone would come along and give you whatever it is that you need in that moment?

Well, the good news is, that “someone” is YOU!

Think about it. You have the power to give yourself exactly what you need every single day. You really do – I’m not just saying that.

Here’s something I’d love for you to try as the new year gets underway:

As you begin each day, spend a few moments with yourself. You could try meditating, going for a brief walk, doing some journaling or stretching – anything that slows you down and puts you in touch with yourself.

At the end of those moments, think about one thing that you want to give yourself as the day progresses. Don’t limit your thinking – all the possibilities are open to you.

• Maybe it will be something intangible like self-confidence or focus.
• Or maybe some days it will be something quite concrete like a movie at 7:30 PM, or a piece of chocolate after dinner.
• Whatever it is, it should be something that you would like to give to yourself based on your connection in that moment.
• And whatever it is, be sure that you follow through on it!

At the end of each day, check in with yourself. Did you give yourself what you promised? Or did you give yourself something different?

It helps to keep a small notebook and just jot down, each morning, what you offer yourself. Then at night you can revisit your book and write down what you received. You may begin to see some interesting patterns.

When you give yourself exactly what you need every single day, you are building a warm and trusting relationship with yourself. You will notice that everything feels more positive and more possible as you build a track record of self-nurturing follow-through.

This is such a powerful and sustaining practice … I highly recommend it!

As you transform yourself and your relationship with time, consider this:  Are you an entrepreneur, consultant, or small business owner who’s ready to take the next big step?  If you want to learn how to create and to keep a successful business running on your own, then this is for you! “How to Create Credibility as a Freelancer” is a booklet with 70 expert-proven tips that will help you recharge your energy and motivation, increase your visibility, and sharpen those vital organizational and time management skills.

Success is within your reach, so don’t wait, click this link and get started today!  http://bit.ly/FreelanceTips

Have you ever noticed how the “magic of the holidays” can occasionally regress some of your nearest and dearest into cantankerous versions of themselves? Well, it’s important to remember that this can happen to you, too!

But it needn’t. It helps to remember that what I wrote about gifts in a previous post holds true for all the other holiday preparations, too. No matter how many hours you invest in creating “perfect” holiday treats and settings, friends and family largely create their own levels of satisfaction. By celebrating clarity and realism … and not sentimentalizing the season, you can retain your perspective and your sense of humor, too.

When you say No to wishful thinking and unrealistic fantasies, you increase the likelihood that you will remain centered and accessible. That way you remain open to the real magic that holiday moments can bring.

And remember, no matter where you travel, you can always be home in your heart for the holidays.  When you’re warmly at home there, then that’s where others will find you.

Happy holidays!

And while I’m on the subject of finding time for more realism and clarity during the holidays, how about a clear and realistic boost for your business?

Are you an entrepreneur, consultant, or small business owner who’s ready to take the next big step?

If you want to learn how to create and to keep a successful business running on your own, then this is for you! “How to Create Credibility as a Freelancer” is a booklet with 70 expert-proven tips that will help you recharge your energy and motivation, increase your visibility, and sharpen those vital organizational and time management skills.

Success is within your reach, so don’t wait, click this link and get started today!  http://bit.ly/FreelanceTips

Courage is you, living self-referenced yet emotionally connected. You fully respect the vivid range of feelings and associations that we all hold about these, or any, holidays.  At the same time, you allow your own priorities and perceptions to direct your time choices.

When I talk about heart-based holidays I picture you reaching out in authentic and caring ways from your heart. Your genuineness and honesty speak powerfully and carry a warmth and meaning that eclipses symbolic gestures that might arise from feelings of obligation.  Those gestures carry you away from yourself and ultimately deplete you.

Here’s a helpful myth to retire:  You know how legions of ads proclaim that you make or break your loved ones’ holidays by your choice of gifts? Not so! No matter how exhaustively you search for that perfect present, you cannot commandeer or control someone else’s holiday experience.

Accepting this in advance can reduce your stress considerably … not to mention keeping you out of some very long shopping lines! And you may spend less time poring over catalogues that entreat you to bust your budget, too.

You can use the time you save appreciating the people in your life directly, right now! So take a nice, deep breath and enjoy simplifying your season.

So are you ready to move courageously toward more self-reference for your Heart-Based Holidays? 

Well, here’s another way to explore ways to increase your authenticity and inner power – whether it’s in your business, or your personal life … I am so pleased to be able to offer my expertise and support as The Official SelfGrowth.com Guide to “Time Management”.

You can visit by clicking the link, and when you do you’ll find lots of time management articles by experts in the field, along with a vibrant and welcoming on-line community. Stop by my Expert Page and leave a comment or question … or just say hello.  There are lots of ways to connect … I’d love to get started!