Transitions and Time - The Time Finder with Paula Eder

The Time Finder with Paula Eder

The way you use your time is the way you live your life.

Archive for 'Transitions and Time'

Finding Time to Stay Connected Through Your Transitions

Posted on May 22, 2012 by Paula, under Transitions and Time.

Finding time to nourish yourself through your transitions is a time management skill that will stand you in good stead, no matter what changes and challenges life presents. And it’s helpful to remember that your transitions also are affected by and have an impact on the lives of those around you.

It can be difficult to stay connected and nurture relationships when much of your energy is being used to cope with the changes you are experiencing. However, it is important, and well worth the effort, to keep the people close to you involved and informed as you navigate life transitions.

What kinds of changes are we talking about here? Well, what constitutes a transition will vary from individual to individual. But some universally experienced transitions would include things like a death or illness, moving to a new city, changing jobs, the loss (or beginning) of a relationship, etc. There are also developmental transitions that we all experience as we age, and we adjust to the changes that that process brings.

Time is really a constantly-flowing river of transitions. So, here are some things to consider, as you strive to nourish yourself and stay connected with your friends and family through ANY kind of life change:

Ask them what they see as important about the event. Be sure to encourage each person in your circle to state what he or she thinks will be important during this life transition. What are the anticipated gains and losses? Do people have fears about what lies ahead? Are there things that they are excited about? This gives everyone a good sense of the emotional terrain you’re traveling together.

Allow each person making this life journey with you to be clear about what he or she expects to need from you.

As you plan for finding the time you need to nourish yourself, be as clear and sensitive as you can about each person’s feelings, needs, and the unavoidable changes each will need to make. This doesn’t mean that you need to ‘take care of’ everyone’s needs – but acknowledging those needs directly and validating their importance is a key component in staying connected.

For those of you who live alone, it is equally important to include your support system in your planning. Problem solving together creates a sense of teamwork and coordinates efforts. This will ease the transition for everyone concerned.

Remember that this is a dynamic process over time. Keep the lines of communication open and stay connected with each other to ensure that original decisions are still working. Be flexible and encourage everyone to be open to adjusting plans as the transition evolves.

So, how can you navigate changes, stay connected with your friends and family, and make even more of your time using time management tips?

Well. are you interested in learning more about the Heart-Based Time Management™ Path? Here’s one way that you can transform and deepen your relationship to time in the Heart-Based Way … I invite you to explore Secrets of Heart-Based Time Management™ - my chapter in the book I co-authored - Stepping Stones to Success! In it I share my proven system for exploring and harnessing the power of your mind, your body and your spirit to help you deepen your experience of time and of your life.

As you work with the ideas I offer, you’ll explore your patterns, clarify your values, identify and prioritize your goals … and create your path for achieving them. You can give yourself the gift of this wonderful resource today, and get started on your journey toward success, Stepping Stone by Stepping Stone …just click this link to get the details!

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Find Time to Nourish Your Way Through Your Transitions

Posted on May 16, 2012 by Paula, under Transitions and Time.

Springtime is a time of transition, and finding time to support yourself as you go through your life transitions is a time management skill that is key to maintaining your energy, productivity, and perspective … no matter what! The reality is that your schedule is already busy with relationships, work, and the logistics of daily living. And then there are times when you are faced with a major life transition.

What are major life transitions? This may vary from person to person, depending on your values, cultural norms, etc. So, for starters, it’s helpful to think about how YOU define a life transition. Starting or ending primary relationships, having a child, moving to new surroundings, and changing jobs are likely to be major life transitions for anyone who undergoes them. Other life events may also affect you profoundly. What is unique to you is how you experience such events and how you find the time to meet your personal needs.

To get yourself familiar with your own relationship to your transitions, take any example of an event that is a life transition. Set aside 15 minutes once or twice a week to think about it. During your 15 minutes of reflection, write down the support you will need and the changes you will need to make to find the time to successfully navigate this transition.

This is a process of developing and deepening your intimacy with yourself; and you may discover things that surprise you. That’s because transitions are times of great opportunity and also great vulnerability. Think of yourself as a new seedling, germinating and pushing its way up through the ground. A fundamental change is taking place – and your task is to befriend yourself, help yourself, nurture yourself, as you come through!

So, welcome the information that you glean from your inner dialogue, and follow-through on giving yourself what you need. In this way you build self-trust. You come to know, right down to your toes, that you will be there for yourself, no matter what!

Your life transitions often involve other people, too. So stay tuned. We’ll continue and expand on this next week, as we explore more of the in’s and out’s of finding time to nourish yourself through your transitions!

So, want to learn more about how you can expand and deepen your time and efforts … in whatever areas you choose? Here’s a great way to explore avenues to increasing your time skills and heart-based power – whether it’s in your business, or your personal life. I am so pleased to be able to offer my expertise and support as The Official SelfGrowth.com Guide to “Time Management”.

You can visit by clicking the link, and when you do you’ll find lots of time management articles by experts in the field, along with a vibrant and welcoming on-line community. Stop by my Expert Page and leave a comment or question … or just say hello. There are lots of ways to connect … let’s get started!

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Find Time to Let Changes Change You, Too!

Posted on October 25, 2011 by Paula, under Transitions and Time.

Finding time to deal with changes and transitions in life is a perennial challenge. While change is inevitable, it isn’t something that we always welcome because it means, well … change!

Maybe part of what we react to, in thinking about change, is the fact that it may ask that we change ourselves. So, what if we welcomed that, rather than instinctively backing away from it?

How much richer can your experience be if you let changes change you?

Here’s an example of a fairly typical situation: I was recently talking with a friend who has, for many years, enjoyed a ritual of solitude around the time of her birthday. This year she has been surprised to find herself feeling a little bit nervous about this familiar ritual.

One possible response to these feelings would be to change the ritual, or even skip it entirely. But here’s another path to consider: the heart-based path.

I’d suggest, first and foremost, choosing to welcome these new feelings. Rather than unwelcome visitors, view them as messengers bringing helpful new information about you. You can cultivate an attitude of compassionate curiosity about yourself!

Having welcomed your feelings, I suggest that you next think about the changes that have prompted them. Explore how you feel about each change and the challenges presented. Then make conscious decisions about how to manage the challenges. Maybe you want to stretch yourself in some areas, and back off in others. The more specific you can be the better.

Next, it’s helpful to continue to assess your experience as you go through it. So pay attention to your feelings before, during, and after the change that you are going through. Ask yourself how you are doing, much as you would ask a friend. Pay attention to your answers, as they will help you take your next steps.

Changes are like doors opening. As you step through, you not only learn new things about your world, you also learn new things about YOU. The more you can let changes change you, the more you can stretch and grow into ever-deepening self knowledge, strength, and power.

So are you ready to start moving toward change and open to the feelings it brings?

Stay tuned, there’s more to come … and in the meantime, as you explore ways to increase your power and effectiveness – whether it’s in your business, or your personal life … I am so pleased to be able to offer my expertise and support as The Official SelfGrowth.com Guide to “Time Management”.

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Find Time to Let Transition Times Foster the Changes You Already Want to Make

Posted on September 21, 2011 by Paula, under Transitions and Time.

Finding time to welcome transition times, make the most of them and even come to appreciate them, is a worthwhile challenge to explore. As we noted in yesterday’s post, much about how we approach transitions may be defined by what we learned about them as we grew up.

And, as we discussed yesterday, those lessons affect us profoundly and can even determine many of our actions if we travel through life unaware of their power. But one of the secrets of heart-based time management is that we can free ourselves from those old limitations. Those messages aren’t written in stone, and the first step toward freedom is becoming aware.

The next step is to consciously choose how YOU, your powerful and grounded adult self, want to approach transition times. It is so important to remember that this choice is entirely yours to make, and it shapes everything that follows.

What if you chose to welcome, not fear, your transitions?
Imagine choosing to view the unknown as filled with positive and exciting possibilities!
What if you embraced opportunities to let go of the old? What would that feel like?

You see, transition times are times when things really are in flux. As the illustration shows, you are letting go of one trapeze and have not yet grabbed another.

Try seeing this as a moment of pure potential (rather than pure terror). You are confident of your strength and skills. You know that you are not going to fall. So, in this transition time, what do you want to do?

Are there tasks or habits or items that you would like to let go of?
Conversely, is there something new that you would like to start?

Here’s an everyday example: When I make the annual transition from summer to autumn, I put my summer clothes away and pull out my cold weather gear. And I always use the time to declutter my drawers and closets, sending unused items either to Goodwill or to the cloth recycling bin at our town recycling center. Larger life transitions may present more profound challenges and opportunities.

What they all have in common, these transition times, is that something is changing and you have an opening to reflect and reassess. If you listen closely, what transition times are saying to you is: “Change is here no matter what, so is there anything that YOU want to change while we’re at it?”

Just ask yourself, the next time you’re in transition, “Are there other changes I’d like to make in this moment?” Listen to your answer, make it real, and drop me a line - I’d love to hear how it goes!

And are you interested in deepening your relationship to time in the Heart-Based Way? Then, I invite you to explore Secrets of Heart-Based Time Management - my chapter in the book I co-authored - Stepping Stones to Success! In it I share my proven system for exploring and harnessing the power of your mind, your body and your spirit to help you deepen your experience of time and of your life. As you work with the ideas I offer, you’ll explore your patterns, clarify your values, identify and prioritize your goals … and create your path for achieving them. You can give yourself the gift of this wonderful resource today, and get started on your journey toward success, Stepping Stone by Stepping Stone …just click this link to get the details!

Let’s explore time together …

Find Time to Survive and Thrive Through Every Transition Time! (thetimefinder.com)
Find Time to Value Your Values the Heart-Based Way (thetimefinder.com)
Find Time to Banish Guilt and Revitalize Yourself Today! (thetimefinder.com)
Find Time When You Need It Most Using Timely Flexible Focus (thetimefinder.com)

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Find Time to Survive and Thrive Through Every Transition Time!

Posted on September 20, 2011 by Paula, under Transitions and Time.

Finding time to move through transitions planfully and proactively can help you benefit from these times, rather than be overwhelmed and disoriented by them. In my next two posts I’d like to explore how you can do this. So, let’s start with a fundamental fact about transitions.

Transition time isn’t really a different kind of time, even though we all have a tendency to see it that way. In reality, we are always in transition. Whether it’s transitioning from sleep to wakefulness, vacation back to work, or season to season, we live each of our moments in transition time.

Just think about it: every in-breath is followed by an out-breath. Transition time is a part of us, right down to our cells. So why do we feel challenged by transitions?

The heart-based way is to look within to find the answer to this question. And looking within, I suspect that you’ll find that your response to transition time is shaped by your past experiences of these times, and by your confidence in your skills and agility when it comes to navigating change.

Focusing on past experiences for a moment, think about the ways that your parents or other significant people in your life responded to transition time:

Were there seasonal rituals in your family?
Were they enjoyable?
Were they ordeals to be endured or challenges to be feared?

When you approach a transition time, do you see opportunity there? Or do Victim messages about change echo from your past and color your present-day responses?

Well, the good news is that if the latter is the case for you, seeing it is your first step toward taking charge of your transition time and learning to thrive, rather than just survive these times in your life.

Let’s explore time together …

And while I’m on the subject of taking charge of your time and thriving … are you a solopreneur, consultant, or small business owner who’s ready to take the next big step?

If you want to learn how to create and to keep a successful business running on your own, then this is for you! “How to Create Credibility as a Freelancer” is a booklet with 70 expert-proven tips that will help you recharge your energy and motivation, increase your visibility, and sharpen those vital organizational and time management skills.

Success is within your reach, so don’t wait, click this link and get started today! http://bit.ly/FreelanceTips

Find Time to Thrive with Flexible Focus-2 Timely Touchstones (thetimefinder.com)
Find Time to Use Your Choices to Move Into Your Power-3 Time Truths (thetimefinder.com)
Finding Time to Feel then Deal with Disaster (thetimefinder.com)

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Finding Time to Feel then Deal with Disaster

Posted on August 30, 2011 by Paula, under Time and Energy, Time Choices, Transitions and Time.

Finding time to deal with disaster is not a subject that we relish writing about. But it’s something we all need to be prepared for, as Hurricane Irene most recently reminded us.

When confronted with sudden change, one key coping strategy is to take a step back and give yourself time to let your feelings out about what has happened.

You’ll notice I didn’t say ”explore”, but “let out”. You can take time to explore later, but in the heat of the moment it’s vital to “take the top off” in a safe setting. This will help you think as clearly as possible as quickly as possible. Doing this gives you access to you best problem-solving abilities, as you meet whatever challenges arise.

Once you have done what you can to clear the air for yourself, it’s important to quickly assess the situation, and address emergent challenges and problems. Mitigate the immediate damage as best you can, and prepare for whatever the next step might be.

Throughout the process, as you sort things out, be aware that you may need to take moments here and there to safely vent feelings of frustration and loss that will muddy the waters if left to fester. Then you can return to your practical problem-solving with more clarity and positive energy.

Attitude of Gratitude. In the midst of unexpected change, there are always things to be grateful for. When you reflect on what you are grateful for you create a nourishing base of positive energy for yourself. This is a vital and affirming touchstone that can sustain you through turmoil as you deal with disaster.

It is remarkably helpful to open yourself to the process of unfolding change. Your focus will shift and narrow to what lies straight ahead as you deal with disaster. Don’t fight it. As time moves forward, your vista will widen again.

Here are 3 things that you can count on as you deal with disaster … even as you feel like your world has been turned upside down:

With each moment, the impact and ramifications of what has happened will be felt, like ripples on water.
With each moment you will have new challenges and opportunities to respond to.
And with each choice you make, you shape the next moment.

A disaster like Hurricane Irene can feel like it is a single event in time – but really, that event is just the start of a moment-by-moment evolution that can take you in directions that you might never have imagined. Remaining as open as you can to this process is a wonderful gift you can give yourself!

These skills will simplify and deepen your experience as you deal with disaster … or most anything. And they can be lifesavers! How can you apply them in your life?

Let’s explore time together …

And while I’m on the subject of exploration, transformation and empowerment, are you a solopreneur, consultant, or small business owner who’s ready to take the next big step? If you want to learn how to create and to keep a successful business running on your own, then this is for you!

“How to Create Credibility as a Freelancer” is a booklet with 70 expert-proven tips that will help you recharge your energy and motivation, increase your visibility, and sharpen those vital organizational and time management skills. Success is within your reach, so don’t wait, click this link and get started today! http://bit.ly/FreelanceTips