New habits. Ask anyone about them, this time of year, and you’re likely to get a blank stare, a hapless shrug, or maybe a defensive response.
That’s because when it comes to developing new habits we tend to relate in a black-and-white way.
We’re either doing it or we aren’t, and there’s no process involved.
This sets us up for failure 99% of the time – and that’s a discouraging track record, to be sure!
New Habits – a Different Perspective
So I’d suggest thinking about creating new habits in a different way. And since we just had a lot of snow here in New Hampshire, skiing springs to mind as a metaphor.
If you’re learning to ski, you are going to fall from time to time. That’s part of the process. And when you fall, you get up and try again, having learned a little bit more about how to avoid falls in the future.
The more you do this, the better you become at the skill of skiing.
But with new habits, we expect ourselves to ‘get it’ right away. We don’t see the habit as a skill we develop and get better and better at over time.
So, when we don’t follow through on the new habit, we feel we have failed – and we stop.
Maybe not right away. Maybe we try a couple more times – but we don’t see this as skill-building. It’s success or failure – yes or no.
Trying a different approach makes a lot of sense, don’t you think?
New Habits and Skiing – One More Thing
The other thing I like about the analogy of skiing and new habits is that even once you’ve learned to ski (or have established your new habit) life continues to offer challenges and opportunities to learn and hone your skill.
The terrain changes. You ski different mountains with more difficult runs. The quality of the snow varies.
All of these things require adjustments and skill-building – and the exact same concept applies to your new habits.
Life simply isn’t rote; there are always choices involved! So, what’s your next step to solidify one of your new habits? Here’s a time tool that will help:
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