Perfectionism is poison. Let go of unrealistic expectations.
Perfectionism is poison. But what about your perfectionism?
Maybe sometimes it’s subtle.
And maybe sometimes it’s glaring.
But on any and every level, perfectionism is poison and it exerts a paralyzing influence.
So, would you say that perfectionism is poison for you?
If so, the first challenge is to recognize it. Only when you see it can you apply the antidote.
But here’s the problem; if you desperately want to be perfect, self-diagnosis can feel excruciatingly painful and difficult. Identifying your desire to please, and seeing how it debilitates you, is especially challenging since perfectionism is often highly rewarded in society.
Where Does Your Perfectionism Come From?
So the best way to start this journey is with compassion. Self-acceptance mobilizes you and makes it unnecessary to seek validation from others. Then, by opening up to an understanding where your desire to be perfect started, you can begin to reduce its power.
Let’s start by briefly examining these origins. I invite you to open your mind and open your heart and remember that perfectionism is poison, AND it is overcome with compassion and realism.
Perfectionism usually has its roots in early childhood and is generally an attempt to control something that feels uncontrollable. Perhaps in response to criticism or punishment, you attempted to master your environment by providing what was demanded of you. This could set you on a perfectionistic course.
Where Perfectionism is Poison:
When you relate as a perfectionist, you:
- Relate reactively rather than responsively. You waste hours trying to second-guess others’ needs and desires and not enough time defining what you genuinely need.
- Smile stiffly – like an exaggerated grin you might wear in front of a camera. This reflects stress, not confidence or happiness.
- Have increasing difficulty managing anger and disappointment because you have forfeited your autonomy. Punishing behavior often follows right on the heels of efforts to please and control.
- Find it difficult to balance your life, working incessantly and feeling that nothing is ever good enough.
- And in extreme instances, you may become completely paralyzed. The fear and pain of making mistakes drains your incentive to explore and extend yourself.
If you now feel clearer about the role of perfectionism in your life, be sure to validate yourself. You’ve taken a powerful step to recover from its effects on you, and ongoing work will help you continue to enhance your productivity and pleasure in life.
What will be your next step? How will you take it today?
Here’s more help:
Perfectionism eats up the energy and undermines the confidence of countless bright, energetic, and talented people. Are you one of them?
“Why Perfectionists Aren’t Perfect: How to Overcome the Pitfalls of Perfectionism and Change Your Life for Good” puts proven, practical, heart-based time success tools into your hands. It gently steers you to a more profound understanding of your challenges and helps you unlock the door to your freedom. With this E-Guide Book you engage in a process of learning that is deepening and doable and definitely within your reach. The thought-provoking strategies, tips and exercises help you discover how to:
- Recognize the messages that fuel your perfectionism,
- Create new realistic and compassionate messages to empower yourself, and
- Increase your confidence, creativity, productivity, and satisfaction.
This is an E-Guide Book to be worked with. And it comes with two powerful bonuses:
- “Perfectionism and Procrastination: Untangling the Knots” is an immediately downloadable Special Report that sells separately for $9.95 — and is my gift to you! This Special Report takes you by the hand and leads you through sequenced exercises. It also includes a customizable template with concrete examples to help you solidify your learning as you deepen your understanding of yourself and your time choices.
- And in addition to this Special Report, we’ve added a 5-week e-course. You’ll receive weekly, bite-sized servings of “Why Perfectionists Aren’t Perfect” — right to your in-box.
So, are you tired of feeling like your own worst enemy? And are you ready to step away from perfectionism and free up the time and energy it’s been devouring? Then click the link below to learn more about this transformative time tool and the bonuses that come with it.
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