Stuck and scared? You can find time instead!
When you’re stuck, scared or just plain stymied, the temptation is to turn (or run) away from whatever you perceive as the problem. It’s instinctual – a knee jerk reaction that may have saved us back when dinosaurs wandered the earth.
But it often doesn’t serve us now. In fact, in many cases it’s about the worst thing you can do if you’re stuck or scared. Turning away doesn’t make the problem disappear – but it DOES keep you from moving ahead.
When it comes to finding time, turning toward the problem is what you need to do. And you can train yourself to do it – even when your instincts may be telling you to do the opposite.
Stuck? You Can Make a Different Choice
What do I mean by turning toward your problem or stuck place? It’s a pretty simple choice – and it’s very powerful.
When you’re in flight mode, or feel yourself avoiding and procrastinating about something, just pause and take a breath. Ask yourself what you are afraid will happen – or what you expect to happen if you move toward whatever has you stymied.
Let yourself be honest – don’t over-think.
Once you’ve made your fear or expectation visible to yourself, it immediately loses some of it’s heft and power. And you can bring it down to size even more by introducing your grounded, rational, adult perspective to this internal dynamic.
Get Un-Stuck Using Your Adult Voice
Let’s say you have a project at work and you’re procrastinating about it. You ask yourself what you’re afraid of and here’s what you learn:
I’m afraid that if I do well on this project the expectations that people have for me will go through the roof and I’ll have to work harder and harder just to keep up.
Seeing the fear gives it a shape and a name; and now you can address it with your Adult Voice. You might say something like:
I see that I’m afraid that success will take away my autonomy. But I know in my heart that, with each step along the way, I have choices. I choose to do my best, and to be clear and direct about my boundaries when I need to. I use boundaries to take care of myself, rather than trying to do so my avoiding challenges and limiting my efforts or my aspirations!
Bringing in your Inner Adult when you find yourself stuck in fear or avoidance is a fast and sure-fire path to finding time. It’s a matter of choice – and that’s a power that you always hold in your hands!
Another dynamic that keeps you stuck and stymied is the input you receive from your Inner Critic. “‘These Critical Voices Are Driving Me Crazy!’ How to Use Positive Self-Talk to Save Your Sanity and Your Time!” is my Exercise and Guide Book that offers a powerful (and empowering) antidote to the destructiveness of self-criticism! With practical exercises, checklists and tips “Voices” helps you recognize the critical voices you carry inside. And not only that – it gives you a step-by-step path to take back your power and counter those negative messages with clear, positive messages of your own. Click this link to get started!
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