Toxic Anger Tripping You Up? These 3 Steps Will Help

no one can take your time
Look inside…

Toxic anger and anger are different. While simple anger can be a challenging emotion, toxic anger takes it up several notches.

It’s a time trap that snags lots of people. But the good news is that once you recognize toxic anger you are starting to reclaim your power. As you do this, you begin to free yourself and boost your effectiveness. 

So, let’s explore 3 toxic anger traps that may ring a bell for you.  Then I’ll share an exercise that will help you move toward freedom in just 3 simple steps.

3 Toxic Anger Traps

  • Reliving your anger keeps you stuck.  Rehearsing, justifying, and fuming are huge time-wasters that keep you spinning and get you nowhere.  Time moves on while you tread water.

  • Leaking or spewing your anger destroys relationships AND effectiveness.  Sooner or later your anger will escape and things get messy!  Splattered anger hurts others and lowers self-esteem. Work takes longer and results don’t shine!

  • Denial blinds you and dulls your judgment. You can’t deal with something if you deny it.  Not only that but when you tune out anger, you lose clarity more generally.  Your powers of observation and decision-making suffer, and you are more likely to make mistakes … losing more time! 

Here’s a simple exercise to restore your effectiveness, safeguard key relationships, and ultimately help you save your time from sneaky anger traps!

3 Steps to Spring the Toxic Anger Trap and Free Up Your Time

  1. Let the anger out – in an unsent anger letter.  This is a powerful tool for relieving the stress that anger creates.  Write a letter to the person or situation that has you angry, and censor nothing. Letting off steam now makes it possible for you to think clearly later. Try re-reading your letter(s) and see what you discover.  What happens to your sense of personal power?  Bring this to the next step.
  2. Strengthen your autonomy to empower yourself.  As you take responsibility for your responses, you gain a sense of power, as well as increased flexibility.  When you let go of reactivity and know that you can address this anger and fix your problem independently, you set yourself free. Self-confidence grows, the weight of anger lightens, and you free up your time. 
  3. Proactively move ahead to resolve the source of your anger.  You don’t need to wait.  Go ahead and create action steps to resolve whatever lies at the source of your anger.  This is something you do on your own, without reference to others’ choices. As you do this, notice how the more power you claim over your time choices, the less power anyone else exerts over you.  And there’s an added benefit; your relationships improve.

This practical exercise profoundly shifts the balance of power when it comes to your time choices.  As you shift from reactivity to a proactive, self-referenced orientation, expect to be surprised.  You’ll develop a whole new level of self-awareness, along with greatly enhanced skill when it comes to managing your moments.

And here’s more help…

We all have voices that chatter at us throughout the day. The Inner Critic is one of them. Learning to recognize (and counter) this destructive voice is one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself.

You see, the Inner Critic is a negative, debilitating and constant presence in your life.  And it’s not just the words. It’s the judgmental tone, the rolling eyes, and the scolding wag of the index finger. Beyond sapping your energy and confidence, your Inner Critic robs you of time and profoundly distorts how you see others and how you feel about yourself. So, what can you do? 

Give yourself a big boost with my Exercise and Guide Book titled “These Critical Voices Are Driving Me Crazy!” How to Use Positive Self-Talk to Save Your Sanity and Your Time! Part of my popular Voices Package, this E-Guide offers simple, practical exercises, checklists, and tips for learning to recognize and counter the critical voices that disrupt and hurt you.

“This guidebook is by a secret genius as far as I’m concerned.
Her name is Paula Eder and she is absolutely brilliant
when it comes to how to be in relationship with self and
how to be in relationship with time.”
Heather Dominick

The power is yours…

You hold the power to make conscious choices about the kinds of messages you give yourself. As you exercise this power, you’ll develop new clarity and confidence – and transform your time.

“These Critical Voices Are Driving Me Crazy!” opens the door and gives you a roadmap, so don’t wait. Click this link to learn more about the Voices Package and get started on your empowering journey today.

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