Your Rigidity Keeps You Stuck. Your Flexibility Frees You.


If your rigidity has you stuck, breathe…

Your rigidity isn’t a quality that you want to cultivate.

Yet it’s easy to confuse your discipline with your rigidity sometimes.

And the results generally aren’t very pretty.

When you’re busy, getting everything done requires that you do some planning.  If you don’t, you’ll be at sea in the midst of a floating array of seemingly random (and demanding) tasks, priorities, and dreams.

And planning requires both focus and flexibility.  I emphasize flexibility because so often when we develop plans, our attitude is that we need to stick to them no matter what.

Your Discipline vs. Your Rigidity:

There’s a whole world of difference between your disciplined follow-through and your rigidity. Think about how you feel when met by someone else’s rigid response to a change.  Do sparks fly?  Do you seethe inside?  Do you feel responded to or rebuffed?

That’s what can happen when your PLAN becomes your priority and you lose sight of whatever your priority actually was to begin with.  When you’re moving toward rigidity, you are becoming so committed to your PLAN that you let other parts of your life suffer. Relationships can be the first casualty.

So how do you learn to tell the difference between when you’re being focused-but-flexible and when your rigidity is taking over?

Be realistic.

Follow-through builds trust and is very, very important.  However, follow-through “no matter what” means that you are not really taking responsibility for exercising judgment and making adult choices.

Circumstances sometimes DO interfere with your plans.  That is a reality of human life.

So, being realistic about your planning and factoring in some flex time can leave space for the unexpected and can actually PROTECT the flow of your day.

Observe how you’re feeling.

When you are feeling your rigidity view it as a red flag.  It’s telling you that you are trying to focus but have lost your balance.  This can happen to anyone, and when you notice this happening, take a deep breath and step back.  Ask yourself:

  • “What are my central commitments?”
  • “How can I adjust to what is happening in this moment?”
  • “Is there anything I can let go of right now?”

Maybe you will shift things around; and maybe you won’t.  The important thing is to check in with yourself and own your choice.  The red flag helps you pause and readjust your perspective.

Focus and flexibility are skills you build.

As you do this skill-building, you’ll find that self-reference is one of your best allies. Keep checking in with yourself to find your balance.  You’ll feel more and more comfortable and agile, as you navigate your day by flexing here, and holding firm there.

Finally, always reflect on your results. Do this, not with a critical eye, but with friendly objectivity.  This allows you to build on your experience and deepen your trust in yourself and your judgment.

How will you start recognizing when your rigidity is in play? What will be your first step?

Here’s more help…

Sometimes your rigidity may be a sign of perfectionism. And perfectionism eats up the energy and undermines the confidence of countless bright, energetic, and talented people. Are you one of them?

 “Why Perfectionists Aren’t Perfect: How to Overcome the Pitfalls of Perfectionism and Change Your Life for Good” puts proven, practical, heart-based time success tools into your hands. It gently steers you to a more profound understanding of your challenges and helps you unlock the door to your freedom.

With this E-Guide Book you engage in a process of learning that is deepening and doable and definitely within your reach. The thought-provoking strategies, tips and exercises help you discover how to:

  • Recognize the messages that fuel your perfectionism,
  • Create new realistic and compassionate messages to empower yourself, and
  • Increase your confidence, creativity, productivity, and satisfaction.

This is an E-Guide Book to be worked with. And it comes with two powerful bonuses:

  • “Perfectionism and Procrastination: Untangling the Knots” is an immediately downloadable Special Report that sells separately for $9.95 — and is my gift to you! This Special Report takes you by the hand and leads you through sequenced exercises. It also includes a customizable template with concrete examples to help you solidify your learning as you deepen your understanding of yourself and your time choices.
  • And in addition to this Special Report, we’ve added a 5-week e-course. You’ll receive weekly, bite-sized servings of “Why Perfectionists Aren’t Perfect” — right to your in-box.

So, are you tired of feeling like your own worst enemy? And are you ready to step away from perfectionism and free up the time and energy it’s been devouring? Then click the link below to learn more about this transformative time tool and the bonuses that come with it.

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